QotD: One Day to Live

What would you do if you had one day to live and you were still young and healthy?
Submitted by Green Tea Adelaide.

Kiss my loved ones and give everything away.

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QotD: I’m Biting My Tongue

What are 10 things you want to say out loud but you can't? 
Submitted by alix.

I find swearing to be incredibly therapeutic, but the rest of the world does not share this opinion, so all day long I work really hard at trying not to pepper every sentence with

1. f—-

2. s—

3. g——– 

(My personal rule is: keep the swearing to a minimum on my blog as well, my mother might be reading this.)

4. To many of the West Virginia drivers on the Dulles Greenway, I often want to yell (but don't ): "The slow lane is on the right! On the right!"

5. To the workers at the post office near my workplace: "Please! Process these people faster! I only get 30 minutes for my lunch break and I'm starving and I just need you to weigh this box and slap some stamps on it! Please! Hurry! For the love of God hurry!"

6. To the outside consultant who is trying to "help" my work team right now: "Dude, you're just repeating Business 101 B.S. over and over again. I am beyond this. I know what a value proposition is, I know what a pipeline is, and I'm not going to use those dorky words to describe what I do!"

7. To my office administrative aides: "OK, the reason why it's important to answer the phones every time they ring is because sometimes the caller at the other end of the line is a very important customer. So no, it's not acceptable when you 'just miss one call.' There are two of you, so surely you can coordinate your bathroom breaks in such a way that no call goes by unanswered. I used to answer phones for a living, so I know it can be done."

8. To Bank of America: "F—- you for raising peoples' interest rates on their credit cards even if they never made a late payment to you. Just because they were late on a payment or two somewhere else does not mean it is ethical for you to jack up their rates at B of A. Your lust for money is inhumane and perverse."

9. To the scary ladies who talk on their cell phones in the stalls in one of the bathrooms in my work building: "Um, ladies, I need a private moment here, and I don't think your pal at the other end of the line really wants to hear a toilet flush. Can't you go gab on your cell phone in the atrium instead?"

10. To one of my coworkers: "OK, you have plenty of evidence and proof that your boyfriend sucks. You're pretty and you can do better than this. Dump this loser and get on with your life while you still have the chance." 

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QotD: Where To Shop Online

Which are your favorite sites for shopping online?

Oh man, being a shopaholic, there are too many to mention. Here's just a few:

 

• www.sephora.com for bath and body products galore
• www.wishingfish.com, www.fredflare.com, and www.etsy.com for unique and weird gifts
• www.seejanework.com for cute and special office products
• www.finnstyle.com for Finnish products

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QotD: Singing A Holiday Tune

Audio: What's your favorite carol or holiday song?

"Hating You for Christmas" by Everclear. It's actually quite a funny and uplifting sounding pop song.

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QotD: Veterans Day

Today is Veterans Day.  Is there anyone you know who has served or is serving in the military that you'd like to honor today? 

1. Thank you to my brother-in-law Jim Gegg of North Carolina–and Happy Marine Corps Birthday one day late, too! Jim served in the first Gulf War.

2. Thank you Dad, wherever you are out there. My father Bill served in the Navy during World War II. (He passed away in 2003).

3. Thank you to all of my military customers for being such great people!

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QotD: A Long, Long Way From Home

Where is the farthest you have ever been away from home? Did you get homesick? 
Submitted by Melissa.

1. Tokyo.

2. No.

I rarely get homesick when I am traveling. The feeling of being in Tokyo was strange, but a good strange. I was deposited there because of my job, with very little prior preparation or knowledge about Japan, the Japanese language, or the frightening monster size of Tokyo. I also had no idea how arduous a 14 hour flight from New Jersey to Tokyo would be. At the 36-consecutive-hours-awake mark, my body broke down entirely, and it made things extra surreal and dreamlike. What I remember of Tokyo:

A. The Japanese people work very hard, and for many long, painful hours every day.

B. The Japanese know their snacks–good stuff. I came home with a suitcase full of candy and dried fish and even fake little cakes made out of plastic that I don't need but had to own anyway.

C. If you go up to the top of the Tokyo Tower, all you see is skyscrapers stretching to the ends of the earth in every direction, plus a little gray smudge in the distance that people claim is Mount Fuji.

D. Don't get in the way of all those serious-faced commuters all dressed in black wool overcoats all walking in the same direction at the same pace at the same time–you'll be a flattened bystander pancake in no time!

E. The lights of Akihabara are blinding and just as beautiful as what you see on television.

F. I want one of their mint green retro mini fridges. Why can't we have those here?

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QotD: Unforgettable Crush

What's the most memorable crush you have had? 
Submitted by spectacular.  

Duckie Dale, 1986. Andie ended up with the wrong guy (at least in the movie version–the book ends differently).

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QotD: The Fight Against Breast Cancer

Its Breast Cancer Awareness Month.  How many people do you know that have been touched by the disease?
Submitted by Karen.

My close family and friends are really lucky–none of us have had breast cancer before. We are grateful we have not had to deal with this illness. (My sister lost an eye to eye cancer, though.)

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QotD: My Lecture on Life Lessons

Dr. Randy Pausch, diagnosed with terminal cancer, delivered a last lecture on life lessons that has been viewed online over a million times.  What would be in your life lessons lecture?

1. In the end, everything will be all right. (Someone died while I held their hand, so I know this to be true from witnessing the end happening in front of me.)

2. The best ways to stay young:

a. Don't lose all of your childlike enthusiasm for the little things. Remember when an ice cream cone or a spotting a salamander could make you excited.

b. Stay active. Play and jump. Just keep moving.

c. Never stop trying to improve your education. Learn and think.

d. Use unscreen and consume antioxidants. Don't smoke.

3. Stop taking things for granted, especially your relatives and close friends. Accidents can happen at any age, so take the time to tell your loved ones how much they mean to you now.

4. Although our country might be flawed, most of us Americans will get to eat dinner tonight, and most of us get to live in relative peace, and these are great gifts. Most of us will never know how it feels to be a war zone refugee, for example. And that's something to be grateful about.

5. Try not to yell at your kids. All they hear is hurt; they won't hear the lesson you are trying to teach them. (But don't be too hard on yourself if you slip sometimes–we all end up yelling at our kids once in awhile.)

6. Just because someone contributes genetic material to the generation of a new child, it does not automatically make them a parent.

7. Reuse, recycle, have a yard sale, donate to thrift.

8. Everyone needs some "alone time" once in awhile–it doesn't mean you are antisocial or ungrateful for your family or friends. But everyone also needs some "social time" making connections with other people once in awhile, too. Otherwise you just end up hoarding cats in your house and piling newspapers eight feel deep in your hallways. (Or, in the case of a relative of mine, stockpiling toilet paper, paper towels, socks, and tissues to the extent that when you die, these stockpiled items supply 4 households with paper goods for 6+ months.) 

9. Americans get less vacation time than nearly any other group of workers in the world. No one ever died saying "I wish I had spent more time sitting in my beige cubicle in the office park!" Take your vacation. Demand time off.

10. Time moves way too fast, so don't feel guilty if you skip out on cleaning the bathtub in favor of frolicking outside instead.

I know, these observations of mine are pretty cliche, but nonetheless this is some of the big stuff life that has taught me so far.   

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QotD: Well, I Never!

Finish this sentence: "I am glad to say that I have never ___." 
Submitted by chl*.

"I am glad to say that I have never undergone any major surgeries or lost any of my body parts."

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